How to Nurture Authentic Growth in Challenging Times

 (Image credit: Photo by Erik-Jan Leusink on Unsplash )

There are days when I don’t feel like myself.

When my mind spins out and goes to places that I don’t even recognize anymore.

But yet, when it goes there, it also feels familiar.

With the mindset and awareness work I do, I’m able to observe it a little more than I used to, but to be perfectly honest the thoughts can be stronger than my willpower sometimes. And I get sad. And I cry. And cry. And cry.

And I let the tears come. Because, as my mom reminds me, tears wash the windows of the soul.

I allow them to cleanse and release the emotions I’ve buried—hidden from others and hidden from myself.

I’m a certified Neuro Coach, I know how to look for sneaky subconscious thoughts, I know what to do with them when I find them, I know how to break the neuropathways they travel, I KNOW not to take them seriously…

…But my body knows and remembers something different.

The thoughts and stories stemming from thinking I wasn’t worthy enough to be seen or heard—of believing I wasn’t valuable unless I was bringing value to someone else—have been occupying space (both physical and energetic) for decades. They’ve built a relationship with my cells and they operate in symbiosis all on their own… they know what to do just as sure as they know how to keep me breathing and my heart beating. It’s survival.

But in learning new things, using more surface-level brain functions, I realize none of that is helping me anymore. I don’t need that automation to keep me alive—it’s actually keeping me very small, very lonely, and quite unremarkable. 

That’s not who any of us are made to be. That’s not the truth. That’s not serving a greater good. That’s not helping ANYONE.

No matter who you are, what you want, or how much you’ve already accomplished, you absolutely have moments where your brain spins out and reminds you of darkness you’ve tried to hide.

It will come out. It will open emotions you remember but don’t like to experience. And that discomfort will make you want to ignore it more.

Please… Don’t. They’ll pick up speed, they’ll multiply, they’ll occupy more space without you even knowing. They’ll build more super-highways in your brain. And they will return… again and again… because they have a job to do: to keep you alive.

But you don’t need that reflex. 

When you have days like this, moments like this, CELEBRATE THEM. These days mean your limiting thoughts are ripe for the picking.

It’s harvest time… only with neuro coaching we burn the harvest.

We burn the stems.

We dig up the roots.

We till the soil.

We choose the seeds we want to plant.

We plant them.

We water them.

We nurture them.

We watch them grow.

And prune.

And weed.

And admire.

And enjoy.

And love.

And sit in the sunshine.

And watch the shadows dance.

Knowing they are part of the journey, something we see, something we can feel, but nothing actually real. Not as real as life.