Making new, normal.

Going through a lot of change all at once is extremely draining. When a new job, a new home, a giant life-altering curveball comes at you (whether you chose it or not)—when every day is vastly different than it used to be—it is exxxhhhaauuussttingggg.

All of that newness burns a LOT of energy—mentally, physically, and emotionally.

Sure, we know that's true. But why? Because your brain has to work harder to process all this new information coming in!

What you look at is different. 

The sounds are different. 

The smells are different. 

The way you move around your space is different. 

The way you make plans, the way you communicate, the way you are BEING is different.

The brain is our hungriest organ, consuming 20% of our body’s energy (and makes up only 2%). It is programmed to hardwire familiarity so that it can conserve energy for other important things! The brain WANTS familiarity. That equals safety. 

So when you’re going through a lot of change—when your eyes are absorbing new sights, and your ears are absorbing new sounds, and your body is absorbing new experiences and going through new motions—it is extremely draining.

But what's the alternative?

The alternative is: Things stay the same.

I was moving furniture this weekend. And my sister and I were able to unload two couches by ourselves out of a uHaul truck. We didn’t immediately think of finding a muscle-man to help us. We just decided we were going to do it ourselves! I was so glad her daughter was there to see us... to see a “normal” world where women just buy their own heavy furniture, rent giant trucks, and furnish a room without hesitation, without permission, and without asking for a hand-out.

What maybe wasn’t normal for women of our generation (lucky for my sisters and I, we come from a long line of strong females), might be normal for her. It got me thinking of the concept of “new normal.” When the new is no longer new, it is normal. It is familiar. It is safe.

Many of us look at our lives and want something new—a new job, a new relationship, a new city, a stronger body. If you’re a business person, you ALWAYS want to up your game, hit that next level, reach new heights.

But deep down in our subconscious mind (which is 95-97% of our thinking), the brain knows that any kind of change is going to be exhausting, and the brain will pull out all the stops to HOLD US BACK and keep us from moving toward that change we so deeply desire.

Therefore… If we think about a future we want, if we want something NEW to be our normal… 

It HAS to feel uncomfortable. 

It HAS to feel hard.

It HAS to feel exhausting.

It HAS to feel painful. 

That is the only way to create change!!

Because our brains are wired to keep things the same, you HAVE to expect difficulty on the path of change. You have to expect challenges, you have to expect pain, you have to expect being tired. All of that means that you are creating a new normal! 

And if that new normal is worth it to you, then so is the pain. So is the suffering. And if you can look at the discomfort as the gateway to change, as the necessary resistance that makes you stronger, perhaps as a Wonder-Woman-couch-slinging quest, maybe you can accept it… use it… and even prepare for it.

If you're ready for BIG change in your life, know that you don’t have to do it alone. You can safely lean into the discomfort and pain when you have someone outside of yourself on the journey with you. 95-97% of your thoughts are on autopilot working against your desire to up-level. You’re too close to your own thoughts to recognize that the brain fog, distractions, self-doubt, procrastination, and lethargy aren’t really real... they're just byproducts of your brain trying to keep things the same. Choose someone to lift that heavy sofa WITH you, so that you can create your new normal a little quicker, a little easier, and with a lot more insight.

Eventually that big change you want in your life will become normal—it will become the new baseline that is hard-wired in your brain—it will become the safe and secure world.

And then... you get to do it again. 😉