What does it really look like to design a life you love?

I played hooky this week so that I could participate in my daughters’ elementary school field day. It was HOT, but it was SO amazing being there to cheer them on and watch them in their school environment. At 5.5 and 7 years old I think it’s incredible to see how they interact with other children. And with this being their first actual year IN school it was so amazing to witness their growth as little people.

Being able to volunteer and participate in your kids’ school activities may not be a big deal to you… but to me it meant a whole lot. For a long time I believed it simply wasn’t even possible to be successful in business AND be an involved parent. Needless to say I’ve chosen to re-wire THAT belief (along with many others)… BECAUSE I wanted to. BECAUSE that belief didn’t support the life I wanted I wanted to live. I CHOSE a new belief… that YES I absolutely can “have it all”—happy family, successful business, and a healthy body to enjoy it all.

That’s MY version of success, a version I love to fine-tune as I go. Designing a life I love was a non-negotiable for me, and I hope it’s something you’ve considered as well.

If you haven’t, I want to show you exactly what it takes to design a life that truly fills you up just by living it. I want to show you the process so that you can design a life that YOU love.

I use the same approach I’d use for any graphic design challenge—the same approach I’ve been perfecting for 20 years as a high-end designer and owner of a design and marketing agency. I call it “The Designer’s Approach to Success” (TDA for short).

I want to empower you to define what success truly looks like FOR YOU (because if it’s not your definition you’ll never truly be happy).

The foundation of *your version of success* is built on these three pillars: 

1. Relationships
2. Health
3. Career/finances

Using TDA we’ll take each of those pillars through a 5-step process. I will warn you…. I’m willing to be a great majority of people don’t do this. 90% of people live day to day, paycheck to paycheck, swayed by their circumstances. Rarely even thinking about creating a life they love, let a lone making a decision to do it and taking actions toward it. I’m not talking to that 90%… I’m talking to you… the small majority of people who regularly push themselves into the unknown, into the uncomfortable, into greater heights… because you believe you can. Because you believe you’re meant to make a bigger impact.

Here are the five stages each design project goes through, and how you can apply them each area of your life to truly design an epic life and business… one that is tailored to fit:

1. Gather information

Here’s how we do it with graphic design:

Before starting any design or marketing project we sit down with our clients to gather important information… we ask ALL the questions! 

•  What do they want to accomplish? 
•  What’s worked, what hasn’t?
•  Ideal audience?
•  Brand persona?
•  How do you want people to feel when they interact with the project?
•  How are we going to know it’s complete?

Now, we can use the same approach to get started designing our lives!:

Have a meeting with the “clients”! In this information gathering phase we’re not going to get emotional… we’re just going to gather facts and create some goals. See what we have to work with and what we need to create. This is where we get really real about our current situation… understanding that we most likely played a majority role in what it’s become. We’re not going to beat ourselves up, we’re taking action toward making a change and that is to be commended!!! We need to know where we are so that we can figure out how to get to where we want to be. Super simple!!

🤝 For relationships: Have a chat with your spouse, kids, significant other, and your friends. 

🍎 For health: It’s time to get intimate with yourself.

💰 For career/finances: You may want to chat with your team, business partner, accountants, etc.

2. First draft

Graphic design:

Once we have the information we can start designing! We start sketching, word-mapping, looking at what other industries are doing to see how we can offer a new perspective. There are no “bad” ideas, we just keep brainstorming and brain dumping, making new connections, dreaming really big! Bigger than budget might allow, bigger than the client would feel comfortable with. And we just get started.

•  High level concepts with information in mind (from Step 1)
•  Perspective shifts, new ideas
•  Really stretching the imagination

Life design:

Now we get started dreaming up what could be! Stretch farther than what feels comfortable! “Shop the catalogue of life,” look around and see what you like (resist the temptation to compare yourself to others… that’s a totally different topic!). Try on different ideas… even if they seem impossible! If you’re recognizing something, it means it’s 100% possible for you. 

🤝 For relationships: What does ideal look like? Dream! Brainstorm! Don’t hold back, now is not the stage for filters. 

🍎 For health: Don’t let genetics, family history, or excuses stop you from imagining what is possible for you. (#epigenetics)

💰 For career/finances: For my entrepreneurial spirits out there, I know I don’t have to remind you to dream big. For those of you in corporate I’m going to encourage you to think beyond your current and past circumstances. Think about ALL the ways you can earn a living outside of what you think you know.

3. Evaluate

Graphic design:

Okay, once we have our initial sketches, color pallets and designs roughly laid out we come back with fresh eyes to see what’s working. We prioritize the designs we like—the ones that fulfill the goal, the ones that bring a fresh look, the ones that will appeal to the ideal audience! And we send the ones that aren’t working as well to the bottom of the pile… or we just delete them.

•  What did we try that we liked?
•  What didn’t work that we thought would?
•  What can we pull back on, adjust?
•  Do we need to go back to round 1?

Life design:

Time to filter and test out your ideas. Just start. Keep trying, keep testing. This isn’t going to be perfect out of the gate! Taking ACTION! This is the part where things get really uncomfortable and where people end up quitting. But quitting isn’t an option, right?? Imagine those clients have given you a hefty deposit because they trust you… they trust that FINALLY someone is going to help that. That someone is YOU, it always has been. So it’s time to STEP UP. TAKE ACTION. Just get started.

🤝 For relationships: Is it regular date nights? Listening to understand instead of listening to hear? More quality time? More help around the house? What are the ideas you came up with to improve the relationships you want to prioritize in your life?

🍎 For health: We could go on for centuries with the million options available, couldn’t we? We all know how to improve our health, why is it that so many people haven’t? Because they don’t follow through with this stage. ACTION! CONSISTENCY!

💰 For career/finances: “I don’t know how” isn’t a reason. Outsourcing without understanding what you’re outsourcing isn’t an option. Blaming the economy isn’t an option. TAKE ACTION TOWARD WHAT YOU WANT AND DON’T LET ANYTHING OR ANYONE GET IN YOUR WAY. Again, this is the area where most of us give up. You are not the majority, you are exceptional.

4. Revise

Graphic design:

Revisions, revisions. Now we’re at the point where we make sure elements are lined up properly, white space is balanced, letter spacing is gorgeous, and the colors and typography are giving off the perfect vibes. “When in doubt, take it out” is a motto that keeps designs looking clean and super professional. We add in the little nuances, like custom icons or bullets, little fades and gradients, and clean up rough edges. We get the project ready to show off our best to our clients!

•  Make adjustments
•  Fine-tune
•  get excited!

Life design:

The hard part is over! Now it’s time to tweak, update, fine-tune! What are you LOVING about what you’re doing? What isn’t working quite like you thought it would? Tread lightly here… consistency is where we get to stay. This is our NEW life! We’re transitioning from an old way of being into a new one!! The person you used to be—their worries, doubts, fears—are no longer welcome here. They’ve been deleted. While we might remember what our “design” looked like, we don’t want to go back. Un-dos have expired. Forward is the only way through at this point, and it’s already looking and feeling better than last version!! You may run into some hiccups, your “computer might crash” [insert unforeseen life circumstance here] and you may have to start a few things over. You might have to spend a little more money than you thought on great “photography” and a specialized team [insert coach, consultant, gym membership here] for support. But you know it’ll all be worth it in the end.

🤝 For relationships: Keep going. Keep trying. Enjoy the moments, soak up this new way of being with the people you love!

🍎 For health: Love your body for how far it’s come. Celebrate your accomplishments this far. Really honor the strength and health you’ve had all along that was so easily overlooked.

💰 For career/finances: Cash flow feels good! But don’t slip back into your old ways. Keep your eyes on what’s possible, keep taking action. Remembering the value in compounded interest… of doing something a little bit every day.

5. Finalize

Graphic design:

The client as approved the direction, they’ve approved the final draft so it’s time to export and send the final file to press! We’ve understood the challenge, conceptualized a creative (and unique) solution, fine-tuned to perfection, and delivered on our promises… time to send the invoice and receive payment for a job well done.

•  Tie up all loose ends
•  Established scope of work is complete
•  Celebrate + enjoy

Life design: 

You not only recognized a challenge/misalignment/problem, you’ve decided to change it. You have dreamt big, you’ve tried new things, you’ve course-corrected, you’ve continued despite hiccups. You took action while keeping your mind and heart focused on YOUR VERSION of success.

Our brains LOVE rewards. So how can you celebrate the new YOU?? Positive reinforcement is what will keep this new neural pathways strong and the old ones deteriorating. Keep reminding your brain how happy you are. Soak it in! This is the time to rest in your victory. Honor how far you’ve come. RECEIVE your payment, you’ve earned it—feelings of fulfillment, joy, satisfaction, gratitude, health, and wealth.

🤝 For relationships: Enjoy precious moments with your friends and loved ones.

🍎 For health: Feel good in your body, nurture it, dress it up, smile at yourself in the mirror.

💰 For career/finances: Feel gratitude for a business that runs like a machine and the security of your finances. Honor and celebrate with your team. Re-invest in your future. 

You only have this one life. 

You are not the majority of people who sleepwalk through it. You are not mediocre. You are not merely an observer.

You are your life, your life is you. No one else can or should design your life, it is exclusively reserved for you. 

You are a designer. A creator. An architect. You are also the client and ideal audience.

You are exceptional. Wonderfully made. And immensely powerful.

“If you don't design your own life plan, chances are you'll fall into someone else's plan, and guess what they have planned for you? Not much.”

JIM ROHN